The Cost of a Life
by LeonaWriter
Summary: Arthur has choices to make that will make or break Camelot, and much of that is riding on his manservant's answer - and how well he knows Merlin. It's a good thing he knows Merlin more than his friend thinks. Fix-it fic for episode 5.05/The Disir.


Arthur phrased the question carefully. Or maybe, he didn't, but what way should that matter? He thought he knew Merlin, and he thought he knew which option his idiotic manservant would choose, any day.

Magic, or a man's life.

Arthur had seen Merlin put himself forward as a sorcerer once before, had seen him do so in order to save the life of Gwen's father not too long after his arrival in Camelot. If it had not been for that...

Merlin, Arthur knew, had always been open-minded about magic. Rather more than some would say that the Prince's – and now King's – manservant should be. But, strange as it might seem, Arthur would never have had him any other way. Merlin reminded him of how he could be, and was oddly wise whenever Arthur was not expecting such from his servant, a breath of fresh air from people expecting him to either fail or spoke of him as a perfect being, one who could do no harm or wrong for the simple matter that he was the king.

Merlin could see things that Arthur could not. It was only recently that Arthur had started to see what Merlin had never thought he could.

He waited for his answer.

And the answer he got was not one that he had been expecting.

"There can be no place for magic in Camelot."

Merlin let out a heavy breath and ran his face through his hands, covering his eyes and making his hair stick up on end and giving him even the general look of an idiot, even more so than usual.

Arthur sighed. Closing his eyes, he nodded.

"You're right, of course. Of course you are."

But Arthur wasn't talking to the Merlin who was sitting on the other side of the fire.

That night, neither of them had much sleep.

Walking into the cave where the Disir were to be the next morning was just as daunting as it had been the previous two times, and looking back on the first, he wished he had been _more_ worried – perhaps if he had been, then none of this would have come to pass.

Merlin followed behind him silently, shuffling his feet and looking downright awful.

"You have returned," stated the first Disir, rather needlessly.

"Is your decision made?" asked the second, somewhat less so.

The tension in the air was thick, and Arthur heard Merlin's breath hitch.

"It is. And I would have it understood that, as king of Camelot, I cannot be seen to bow down to any. If magic were to be returned to the land, I would still be the king of my people. It may not be what you were asking for, but it is what I am willing to give, if you honour the promise by returning my knight to my service."

Arthur could feel Merlin's eyes on him. He could feel the weight of the attention of the Disir. He wondered if he had, in fact, done the right thing.

...

The ride back to Camelot was spent in a tense kind of way; it was clear to Arthur that Merlin had questions, but wasn't asking them, and it was clear also that Arthur had things he wanted to ask Merlin just as badly – and he would, one way or another, get those answers.

Yet there was something stopping them from being said. A tension, perhaps, or a feeling of things that, once said, could never be unsaid.

Yet Arthur was rushed off his feet the moment they returned – he had a promise to keep the moment he saw that Mordred was fit and healthy once again. There were old tomes of law to look at, people to speak with – he was going to need to consult Gaius – he would need to inform the knights and his queen of his decision, and he knew that not all of them, and not all of the lords, would be as amenable to the notion of brining back magic as would make this easy on them all.

Yet that had been the condition of vow, and he could not risk the young knight's life on the matter twice.

The law was passed and the proclamation made a week after their return, and with that magic was allowed, little by little, back into his kingdom.

His father would have been furious.

But then, his father, the last time they had met, had tried to kill his wife and his manservant. Perhaps it was time to stop trying to be his father's son.

Arthur sighed as Merlin edged his way into the king's rooms with supper in hand and somehow found a place to put the food that didn't displace the myriad papers that had suddenly seemed to double themselves since the ban had been lifted.

The druids had started to flock back into the kingdom, now that they were not simply tolerated, but accepted. There was a hesitant sort of intermingling between the two groups, not quite sure if it was allowed, along with the added strange bonus of the forbidden – strange, because it wasn't quite so, any more. Then of course the neighbouring kingdoms had started to send messengers asking when they might be able to re-negotiate the parts of their treaties that had been based around the use, or rather the illegality of, magic.

Closer to home, more and more of his people were outing themselves as sorcerers or had expressed a desire to learn. It would have been more worrying had Gaius not seemed too bothered about the report as it was being delivered. Mordred, one of his most loyal knights and of a druid background, had confided in his king that he had not forgotten that which he had learned in his childhood, and never would have wished to, yet would only wield the power for the good of the kingdom. Arthur had nodded, not truly understanding, not yet, but thankful for his trust.

Yet for some reason, the one person he had wanted a true opinion on the whole matter had stayed silent.

"Merlin?"

"Yes, sire?"

Gods only knew when it was that his servant had started showing him the proper respect he deserved as king. Sometimes he felt nostalgic for when he hadn't cared so much.

"I'm going to ask you a question. And I expect an answer this time. A proper answer, Merlin, not one of your excuses."

Merlin paused, and his expression turned wary. Arthur would have been somewhat disappointed in him if he hadn't been.

"All right."

Arthur nodded. For a moment he turned back to the paperwork, trying to figure out how best to word this.

"Why?"

"Sorry?"

"I'm not finished. I'm asking why you said that magic had no place in Camelot when that goes against everything you've ever said."

If ever Merlin had the look of a deer in a hunter's line of sight, it was now. He seemed ready to run, but unable to, pinned to the spot by Arthur's attention and need for an answer.

"I could ask you why you said that I was right."

"Don't change the subject."

"Arthur, I- It was..." Merlin grimaced, and looked away. "I thought it was for the best. At the time, I thought it was. There was something more important."

"More important than everything that the change in the law has been affecting?" Arthur asked, and the worst thing was that he wasn't being incredulous, or even angry. He knew that there were certain things, certain _people,_ that Merlin would give up everything for.

Normally, he would dismiss the idea out of hand, because it was _Merlin_ they were talking about, and if he was asking for a serious answer, then he understood this at least, that he should take the person he was talking to seriously.

Besides. He'd seen Merlin that day, both as he was deciding what to say and until Arthur had given the Disir their answer.

"I... yes, actually. I thought... something I'd been told suggested that if you did go along with them, you'd be in danger. I couldn't risk that. I just _couldn't, _Arthur."

"And? Have you noticed anything since that day that might put might me in danger, Merlin?"

He was conflicted. There was the side of him that wanted to say that this was ludicrous, that this was _Merlin_ for goodness sake, and what did_Merlin_ ever notice that he wouldn't? But on the other hand if it had affected his manservant badly enough to act out of character, then it was worth taking note of. Not to mention that the change in the law certainly was not sitting well with everyone.

"Er, no. But I don't know whether they meant it was going to happen straight away, or as a kind of delayed reaction thing, or..." Merlin trailed off, looking rather red in the face and avoiding Arthur's eyes. "I don't even know what to think any more myself."

Arthur filed away that particular bit of information for later thought with a sigh.

"Fine." He stood, wandered over to the window – life returning to normal was taking time and patience, on his part and his peoples' - and then turned back to Merlin. "Tell me if anything comes of that threat will you, Merlin?"

Turning back, he didn't see the slight hesitation before his manservant muttered an affirmative and left.

...

AN: Well that didn't come as easily as I thought it would... interestingly enough, there's no actual magic reveal here. I kept intending there to be, but my first intention with the fic was to do a fix-it of a certain kind to The Disir, and that's what I did, the main focus being that Arthur knows Merlin better than Merlin thinks.

I'd assume the magic reveal itself happens not long after, but I didn't want it to be the main focus.


End file.
